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- Song Contests (29 posts)
- 30-March 08
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- Lyricist, Composer or Both?:
- Musical Influences?:
- Any song with good melody and lyrics is going to catch my ear
Posts I've Made
Posted 22 Jul 2014My three top favorites in a three way tie:
Steve's "Table for Two" - lovely melody in waltz time without being old fashioned. Lyrics and music blended brilliantly - I don't tire of listening to this one and it's a worthy winner.
Iggy's "While at Home You Know they were Dancing" - loved the bitter sweet sentiment in the lyrics.
and Neal's excellent "First Kiss" - the chorus really sparkles. Great shame this was disqualified.
Enjoyed listening to all this month's batch of songs greatly - well done everybody.
Posted 12 Jul 2014Tom - Moody Blues wow!, I think that stretches the comparison a bit on this song however praise indeed, many thanks. Glad to hear it's stomping your car speakers!
Iggy - thanks for the helpful suggestions.
That's a great video there and a new group for me to follow up on. I can hear some thing in that rhythm that is similar. Now, if I could make a cool video accompaniment and get as many hits as those guys then...
Justin - thanks for listening and the good suggestions. If I re-record it again one day I'll certainly have a play with them. Cheers.
Mortal - thanks dude! It certainly gets good reactions when every I play it out live - however, it does get blamed for any bad weather after I've played it
Patticake - glad you enjoyed it; many thanks for the listen and supportive comments - they make all the hours of hard work work worth while.
Posted 8 Jul 2014The thing that gets me with this video question is the usual preamble rule to the contest:
Your posted song entry should include the following:
writer credits (If itís a collab with another muser please make that clear by including their muser id)
You are encouraged to include the lyrics in your post, but any other text may be removed by the mod.
Now, if someone had had entered the contest with an audio song link only to their song, say for example: "Love On The Beach", with the following preamble to the lyric:
"Setting the scene here for my song: - imagine a sun drenched windy beach and two strangers. The man gets into difficulties in the water and the woman (a strong swimmer) dives in to save him blah blah blah..."...
I'm presuming that this scene setting text would be removed by the mod because the song and lyric should say all there is to say about the song - even though this extra text could be 'ignored' by anyone listening to the song.
My point - I don't see any difference between scene setting text and video so why potentially ban one and not the other?
Maybe that rule should be modified?
Posted 6 Jul 2014Hi Justin,
My scoring system runs 1-10 for four categories:
"Lyrics", "Melody", "Production and "Listen Again" for which I scored: 6,7,7,6 averaged to 6.5.
The following line seemed awkward:
"The streets are ripe with the smell of old fruit in India" - 13 syllables with lots of 'small' words not doing much.
Maybe something simpler like:
"Streets smell of fruit gone bad/off in India" would enable you to milk the vocal more easily on this line.
Really liked the guitar and instrumentation after the 1st chorus.
I disliked the repetitive outro instrumentation after the second chorus; this really dragged my ending memory of the song down. Also that "Dr Who" effect in the last few seconds sounds a bit gimmicky and is not a true reflection of the rest of your song so why use it?
I'd be tempted to ditch the current outro and use more of that really good instrumentation you created after the 1st chorus; with that fab. guitar noodling away and fade out with that.
Posted 6 Jul 2014This sounds really good Neal - the simple piano backing is effective and your vocals are great.
I totally agree with Oswlek however - in the 3rd from last line in each of the verses ending:
"anymore", "that you say" and "unafraid" the vocal fall-off (trill down) on the last syllable loses massive song momentum.
I longed to hear the last syllable rise to (I think) a "C" and hold for a bit (no trill).
Is this going to be a male vox only? - think it will sparkle even more with some female harmonies added in appropriate places.
Really enjoyed the listen,
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