[Neal K]

TIME TO SUBMIT YOUR SCORES TO ME VIA PRIVATE MESSAGE

- If you enter, you must provide a score or your own lyric will be disqualified.
- Vote for all lyrics except your own on a scale of 1 to 10, whole numbers only (any decimal places or half scores will be rounded down).
- Your lyric gets the average score you gave the others.
- To Be eligible to vote/score in a Muses Muse Lyric contest if you are not a contestant, you must have been an active member for at least 30 days and have a minimum of 10 posts within the previous month.
- Get your scores to me by the end of the day, Friday, March 25
- Winners will be announced on Saturday, March 26, 2011.

Finally, a request to all voters. Please score in keeping with the spirit of the contest. Your votes should reflect not only how you feel a lyric stands up against the competition but how it stands up on its own. In other words, it is not in keeping with the spirit of the contest to isolate a favorite lyric by scoring it very high while scoring all other entries lower than they may deserve.

Here are the lyrics:

Bluebird
Afraid to Open My Eyes
Who Is Free
Love has Room Enough
L'affaire à un café de Paris
Film Noir
Branded by your eyes
I See Now
Love Don't Work That Way
Reckless
The Moon
Tonight I'm Gonna Feel Bad
The River
I Remember Music
Don't tell me things will be OK
It Doesn't touch me
Just a Dream
Sunday Night Song Affair

[Neal K]

Bluebird

Chorus:
If I was a bluebird
Life would be a breeze
Laughing at the people
From the top of the trees
Singing every morning
“It’s a beautiful day”
Then at night my ladybird
And I would fly away

Verse 1:
I wonder why I run so hard toward the finish line
For every step ahead it seems I fall two steps behind
Giving all I’ve got to try and beat the daily grind
And somehow rise above it all to find some peace of mind

Chorus:
If I was a bluebird
Life would be a breeze
Laughing at the people
From the top of the trees
Singing every morning
“It’s a beautiful day”
Then at night my ladybird
And I would fly away

Verse 2:
I wonder why I try so hard and chase after success
For every fool I entertain I find ten unimpressed
Giving in is easier than fighting all the stress
Of searching high and low for twigs to build a bigger nest

Chorus:
If I was a bluebird
Life would be a breeze
Laughing at the people
From the top of the trees
Singing every morning
“It’s a beautiful day”
Then at night my ladybird
And I would fly away

[Neal K]

Afraid To Open My Eyes (in case you disappear)

Verse 1
I still go down to the river
Lie on our soft green bed
But now when shadows fall over me
I'm afraid to turn my head
They may be only clouds
Shielding the summer rays
And not you leaning over me
Tempting with your playful gaze, playful ways

Chorus 1
Afraid to open my eyes
In case you disappear
Although they say it's over
that's still painful to hear
Minutes stretch into hours and
hours I've learned to fear
'Cause each time I open my eyes
you disappear


Verse 2
I still hear the sound of voices
Far off but coming my way
Like when you came to find me
When temper had led me astray
Tempted to turn my head, is it
Strangers on holiday?
Or you calling out to me
To find me like yesterday, how I pray

Chorus 2
Afraid to open my eyes
In case you disappear
Although they say it's over
that's still painful to hear
Minutes stretch into hours and
hours I've learned to fear
'Cause each time I open my eyes
you disappear

Break
This place is me and you
I come here often - do you?
I come here often, to be alone with you
Do you? - do you?

Chorus 3
Afraid to open my eyes
In case you disappear
Although they say it's over
that's still painful to hear
Minutes stretch into hours - oh
Hours I've learned to fear
'Cause each time I open my eyes
Oh each time I open my eyes
You disappear
You disappear

[Neal K]

Who is Free?

V1
while awaiting futures mystic gate to open
the setting sun ends another day
There’s a saddened soul to whom I turn to
who’s out of touch with life and time

Bridge1

as he answers a simple question
he sees no reason nor hears rhyme

Chorus
And he’s unstable on shifting sand
while drowning in changing seas
asking “who knows what I am”
wondering, wondering
who is trapped?
and who ?
who is free?

V2
when life’s project is finally emptied of all meaning
and idle dreams leave lesser souls than mine
I will struggle to find the freedom of ancient times
but in cryptic words meaning can often hide

Bridge2
but within despair we are assaulted
yet our bodies yearn for an escape

Chorus
And he’s unstable on shifting sand
while drowning in changing seas
asking “who knows what I am”
wondering, wondering
who is trapped?
and who ?
who is free?

[Neal K]

Love Has Room Enough

Verse 1
I woke up to bird songs this morning
Mockingbird was singing his repertoire
A concerto of emotion sent waves crashing
Pounding my heart’s eroded shore

Verse 2
I don’t know what kind of game life is playing
Sometimes I don’t know if I can go another day
But I do know there will be celebrating
When time’s tide takes me away

Chorus
Fond memories of you fill my empty spaces
I know the past is not where I should be
I close my eyes and see smiling faces
Love has room enough for you and me

Bridge
I’ll march on until I reach that final hour
For your sake I’ll walk tall and proud
Leaning on the kind mercies of our Savior
Listening for His Trumpet to Sound

Chorus
Fond memories of you fill my empty spaces
I know the past is not where I should be
I close my eyes and see smiling faces
Love has room enough for you and me

Tag
Yes, love has room enough for you and me…

[Neal K]

L'affaire à un café de Paris

V1:
Ten years ago I was living in Paris
Having lunch at a sidewalk café
Then out of nowhere a woman approaches
She asks to sit down, I reply "s'il vous plait"
She picks up the menu and orders
Quiche Lorraine and a modest Chablis
I look at this woman and wonder
Who on earth might she be?

CHORUS 1:
She had aubergine lips and violet eyes
An expression suggesting embarrassed surprise
An irresistible mystery
But why was she sitting with me?

V2:
She toys with her food and takes a small bite
Surveying the tables and chairs
Turning to me, she touches my cheek
Then looks back at her plate and just stares
She opens her mouth, bites her lip
Takes a sip of her wine
I hold my tongue awaiting my moment
Anxiously biding my time

CHORUS 2:
She had aubergine lips and violet eyes
An expression suggesting embarrassed surprise
An irresistible mystery
But why was she sitting with me?
Might she be attracted to me?

BRIDGE:
She catches her breath
Finally speaks
Whispers softly “pardon”
She straightens her dress
Then gets on her feet
And like that she is gone

(Half) V3:
Now I no longer reside there in France
But often think back to that day
And the mademoiselle now haunting my thoughts
My affair at a Paris café

CHORUS 3:
She had aubergine lips and violet eyes
An expression suggesting embarrassed surprise
An irresistible mystery
But why was she sitting with me?
Might she still be thinking of me?

[Neal K]

Film Noir

Camera rolls, Shows the woman’s eyes
Runs out in tears you catch his gaze
you don’t need to hear everything she says
She’s out of there
The musics comes in, he leans back in his chair

Film noir, tired of being the star, film noir

The film goes on, smoke from his cigar
He lowers the blinds, as she drives away
Each scene precise in shades of grey
Seen this part
So many times I’ve learned it off by heart

Film noir, tired of being the star, Film noir

Old movies are best ,watching them alone
shafts of light in the dark
my life portrayed cold and stark
Ceiling fans
these four walls, Cupping my face in my hands

Film noir, tired of being the star
Film noir, tired of being the star
Film noir

[Neal K]

Branded by your eyes

You walked in
I stepped out
On to the edge of darkness
I never knew what love was all about

There you were
Pretty as a picture
From across the room a fixture
That took me by surprise
And stole my heart

Chorus:
Before I could shake it
I wasn’t gonna make it
You had me hooked and mesmerized
And when I saw you staring
I lost all my bearings
And fell victim to
And was branded by your eyes

You had the eyes of Medusa
You could turn a man to stone
With one look I knew I’d never be alone
In my mind I could see
There’s only you and me
And I couldn’t wait until I got you home

You make a hard man easy
I went from tough to tender
I melted right into those eyes of yours
I raised my arms, surrendered
These days I still remember
How I was branded by your eyes by that door


You walked in
I stepped out
On to the edge of darkness
I never knew what love was all about

There you were
Pretty as a picture
From across the room a fixture
That took me by surprise
And stole my heart


Chorus:
Before I could shake it
I wasn’t gonna make it
You had me hooked and mesmerized
And when I saw you staring
I lost all my bearings
And fell victim to
And was branded by your eyes

[Neal K]

I See Now

I was gaining the world, hand over fist
Starving for a reason to exist
Life left me temperamental
And love stopped short of monumental

I was thinking that life was good as is
Blinded to my need for love in it
You changed a determined mind
And cupid’s arrow aligned, just in time

Chorus
I see now
There’s no price tag
On the better things in life
I see now
I deserve
the better things in life
You worked a miracle
Come on, take your bow
‘Cause I see now

I am watching day come to a perfect end
Lying with you as twilight suspends
Now I know it’s elementary
and love is life’s admission fee

Chorus
I see now
There’s no price tag
On the better things in life
I see now
I deserve
the better things in life
You worked a miracle
Come on, take your bow
‘Cause I see now

Bridge
Because of you,
I have a clue to what the hype is all about
feeling foolishly sentimental
Wanna climb on the rooftop and shout…
Yeah, hey, hey, yeah, hey hey, yeah, hey hey, yeah, yeah!
Yeah, hey, hey, yeah, hey hey, yeah, hey hey, yeah, yeah!

Chorus
I see now
There’s no price tag
On the better things in life
I see now
I deserve
the better things in life
You worked a miracle
Come on, take your bow
‘Cause I see now

Outtro
I see now
Yeah, hey, hey, yeah, hey hey, yeah, hey hey, yeah, yeah
(fade out)

[Neal K]

Love Don't Work That Way

Verse 1
Love letters in a shoe box under the bed
One by one I read them like you never left
Butterflies still dance as often as I breathe
Will I ever get you back to needing me?

Chorus
If I could take the wish I wished upon our star that night
I'd let it ride the wind--grab the heart of someone else's life
Turn back the clock of my innocence
And never shake the hand of fate
But love don't work that way

Verse 2
Morning comes--I pry myself from a restless sleep
The jasmine on your pillow lingers from a dream
Coffee's on--I stare into your empty cup
Looking for a way to make this hurtin' stop

Chorus
If I could take the wish I wished upon our star that night
I'd let it ride the wind--grab the heart of someone else's life
Turn back the clock of my innocence
And never shake the hand of fate
But love don't work that way

Bridge
In this little town
There's gossip floatin' all around
Don't they know
That a heart needs time to heal

Chorus
If I could take the wish I wished upon our star that night
I'd let it ride the wind--grab the heart of someone else's life
Turn back the clock of my innocence
And never shake the hand of fate
But love don't work that way

[Neal K]

RECKLESS

I can tear down this church with my bare hands
Curse at my Father and tell him where I stand
But how could I not know my sins
Pray for forgiveness and then do it again

CHORUS 1
I know I’m not there yet
No claim to be perfect
I’m just trying my best
To be a little reckless……

He wakes in the morning with bloodshot eyes
Tells me “I love you, sleep with me tonight”
But I am just too young to know better
I promise myself the world and then I settle

CHORUS 2
I know I’m not over it yet
No claim to be perfect
I’m just trying my best
To be a little reckless….

Maybe one day I will know the truth
The years I spent in hiding, I was hiding from you
And Momma you held me close to your skin
The night my dad left me, left me crying again

INSTRUMENTAL BREAK

BRIDGE
There’s no reason why he should go now
Can’t believe I still want him somehow
I wipe away the shame scarred on my face
But there’s never another one to take his place

CHORUS 3
Cause we’re all good kids
No claim to be perfect
We’re just trying our best
To be a little reckless…

[Neal K]

The Moon

The moon is waxing at night
The earth is tilting while
The tide is turning.
Everything's under water but a slight
Perception of your frame
that's emerging.
Only fate, now and us

-----------------------------

The dark that scares the world
is dimmed by the reflection
of the warm ocean
A glimmer of the light that shows your shape
but lets your Secrets escape
into the blackness.
But the future is so bright
---------------------

Chorus

By choosing the moment when the dark is right
I have lost myself but not my night

----------------------------------
The sea is spreading its waves
And in the mighty swell,
Our bodies by inertia
My hand Silhouetted against the moon
is shadowing some places that could be ours soon
In the water,far and near

------------------------

Chorus

By choosing the moment when the dark is right
I have lost myself but not my night

----------------------------------

But now, the sun is rising
The mystery has gone
Everything's clear.
This obviousness is all I fear
All I want to hide from
So I'm waiting
For the darkness, the waves and us

-------------------------

Chorus

By choosing the moment when the dark is right
I have lost myself but not my night

[Neal K]

Tonight, I’m Gonna Feel Bad

Now she’s gone, and all my friends are here
And I thank God for every single one
But an endless string of platitudes
Designed to perk up my attitude
Doesn’t make for a night full of fun

They say there’s other fishes in the sea
And I just have to get back on that horse
But I know exactly what I need
Time to let a broken heart bleed
And let mother nature run her course

(chorus)
One day I’ll be happy
I had a chance to see Trinidad
And one day Napoleon Dynamite
Won’t make me feel so sad
I know life itself ain’t gone
And tomorrow I’ll start working on
All the good times I’m still gonna have
I thank you, friends
But, tonight, I’m gonna feel bad

Experience tells me this won’t go on forever
It’s sad to say, but I’ve been here before
I won’t always feel sorry for myself
I’ll make room for someone else
But, tonight, I’ll embrace the loss I’m crying for

(chorus)

(bridge)
It doesn’t mean I’m giving up
‘Cuz this ain’t just cola in my cup
Hearts seem to know when enough’s enough
But, tonight, I’m gonna feel bad

Yes, someday the sun will shine
And I’ll get past that she was mine
There’s new love waiting down the line
But, tonight, I’m gonna feel bad

(chorus)

[Neal K]

The River

Sometimes he goes crazy
When the sun goes down
He can be so bitter
When he's been on the town
It's just the bourbon talking
But it sets those spirits walking
Haunting her 'til morning
With an old familiar sound

The river will always come between them
No matter how hard they try to hide
The river will rise up and defeat them
Take away the best days of their lives

They settled in Missouri
In nineteen eighty two
Built a home and family
Where the Mississippi grew
Blind to their existence
As it rolled on in the distance
Until the day they realized
What the river always knew

The river will always come between them
No matter how hard they try to hide
The river will rise up and defeat them
Take away the best days of their lives

A boy of three, already
The image of the man
He loved to watch his Daddy
Navigate the boat to land
Standing in the rushes
Where the river nearly touches
How could she fail to notice
He'd let go of her hand?

The river will always come between them
No matter how hard they try to hide
The river will rise up and defeat them
Take away the best days of their lives

She's older now
It's time she left
His drinking and her damned regret
But she can't yet
No, she can't yet

The river will always come between them
No matter how hard they try to hide
The river will rise up and defeat them
Take away the best days of their lives

[Neal K]

I Remember Music

Sounds of singing drifted
From an adjoining room
Like a breath of springtime
In February’s gloom
The crowded party vanished
When we met eye to eye
A gentle whirlwind caught us
And spun us towards the sky

I Remember Music
Around us in the air
I Remember Music
The music is still there

Topsy-turvy giddy
From the thrilling ride
We floated back to earth
And landed side by side
You introduced yourself
Smiled and said hello
Sparks lit up the night
And we were both aglow


I Remember Music
Around us in the air
I Remember Music
The music is still there

I recall the singing
I recall your eyes
When that magic moment
Took us by surprise
Though long years have passed
Since we lit this flame
Through the changing seasons
Love remains the same

I Remember Music
Around us in the air
I Remember Music
The music is still there

[Neal K]

Don’t you tell me things will be OK

1.
I’m sitting down, I’m sick and tired
I’m here in jail again
What comes around will go around
Been true since God knows when
But I’ve been burned and I have learned
That you are not my friend
So don’t you tell me things will be OK

2.
I bottomed out, I don’t get bail
I’m starting to get sick
Barely slept a wink last night
Dreaming of a fix
And I don’t like to think of you
Out there turning tricks
So don’t you tell me things will be OK

Ch.
We’re riding on a carousel
Getting sick and getting well
You and I cannot escape the ride
If I get off, you get back on
I give you hope and then it’s gone
Got no place to run, no place to hide

3.
But you take care of business well
And do what must be done
You do what you always do
Look after number one
No harm, no blame, I’d do the same
You played me and you won
But don’t you tell me things will be OK

Ch.
We’re riding on a carousel
Getting sick and getting well
You and I cannot escape the ride
If I get off, you get back on
I give you hope and then it’s gone
Got no place to run, no place to hide

Br.
Don’t tell me everything will be OK
Don’t tell me you can see the light of day
They’re calling in the markers and it’s more than I can pay
So don’t you tell me things will be OK

Ch.
We’re riding on a carousel
Getting sick and getting well
You and I cannot escape the ride
If I get off, you get back on
I give you hope and then it’s gone
Got no place to run, no place to hide

[Neal K]

It Doesn't Touch Me

V1
Rain pours down
I like the sound
Hits the roof
And then the ground
It's like you
Sometimes around
Oh but it doesn't touch me

V2
Sad story
On my tv
Worst report
In history
Round the globe
The tears run free
Oh but it doesn't touch me

Chorus
I won't let myself feel it
I must be numb to it all
I've climbed up this emotional cliff
If I am moved - I'll fall

V3
Not on trial
Yet in denial
Show the world
My empty smile
Cage the truth
That cold reptile
So it doesn't touch me...

Chorus
I won't let myself feel it
I must be numb to it all
High on this emotional cliff
If I am moved - I'll fall

Bridge
I must remain detached
Keep a lock on my pleasure and pain
If I'm seduced by either noose
I'll lose my head again

Chorus
I won't let myself feel it
I must be numb to it all
High on this emotional cliff
If I am moved - I'll fall
I'll fall, I'll fall.
So I can't let it touch me

[Neal K]

Just a Dream

It was a flawless night
So serene
I remember the stars were shining bright
Cool and clean
Your laughter lingered in the moonlight
Soft and clear

Playing games of Yahtzee
Out on your patio
Sipping margaritas
Singing with the radio

And like a favorite fantasy
That was just a dream
Just a dream
Just a dream

It was a perfect evening
Long ago
I remember your eyes were brightly shining
Indigo
I stood and said I should be leaving
Then you rose

You whispered, “Please don’t go”
Turned down the radio
Tightly you embraced me
Kissing on your patio

And like a fading fantasy
That was just a dream
Just a dream
Just a dream

Now I wake up in this nightmare
Cold and scared
Alone in the dark
All alone
All alone

And I wish that I was still dreaming
Lie back down and drift away
Far away
Returning to that moment
Praying that I never wake
Never wake
Never wake

But like a fleeting fantasy
It was all a dream
Just a dream
Just a dream

[Neal K]

SUNDAY NIGHT SONG AFFAIR

It's been forty-five hundred miles to Nashville
I'm making a few friends down here
Standing outside the Bluebird
Waiting on a Sunday Night Song Affair

The early show is over
Yet the crowd still hangs around
Can't get enough of that songwriter stuff
Staying late for the original sounds

The line has started forming
Snaking round the parking lot
Anxious faces everywhere
As the doorman opens up a spot

Standing outside the Bluebird
Waiting on a Sunday Night Song Affair
Yeah I'm
Standing outside the Bluebird
Waiting on a Sunday Night Song Affair

He lets in that cute little redhead
Sitting by the front door
Says 'I can fit one more'
'But there's only standing room'

So I'm
Standing inside the Bluebird
Waiting on a Sunday Night Song Affair
Standing inside the Bluebird
Waiting on a Sunday Night Song Affair

I'm tight against an angel
Sent down from heaven above
Starting to get my hopes up
When they begin a song about love

The big man from Alabama
Gives us 12 tales about a new start
He's singing about a redheaded Susan
How that girl's going to break my heart

Standing inside the Bluebird
Waiting on a Sunday Night Song Affair
Yeah I'm
Standing inside the Bluebird
Waiting on a Sunday Night Song Affair

Trying to keep up with the Joneses
So I order another Bourbon Chase
Listening to her pump up the rhythm
On her daddy's ole stand up bass

When in struts the strummer
Heading right for my dreams
Hits on that little angel
Scoots her out of the scene

Standing inside the Bluebird
Waiting on a Sunday Night Song Affair
Yeah I'm
Standing inside the Bluebird
Waiting on a Sunday Night Song Affair

The MC keeps it rolling
Puts a smile upon my face
Doorman lets in another angel
I'm right back in the race

Standing inside the Bluebird
Waiting on a Sunday Night Song Affair
Yeah I'm
Standing inside the Bluebird
Waiting on a Sunday Night Song Affair

[jonie]

And the winner is..........??????

[feegis]

Quote

And the winner is..........??????

Let me save some suspense........I don't think it's me .

A lot of great lyrics this month, no?

[jonie]

feegis, on 27 March 2011 - 04:58 PM, said:

Quote

And the winner is..........??????

Let me save some suspense........I don't think it's me .

A lot of great lyrics this month, no?

I don't think it's me either but I'm damned curious to see if those I thought should win, actually did.

The suspense is killing me.

(Not really)

I lot of lyrics, period. Great, yes.

[Alistair S]

Yes, some very good lyrics this month! My personal winner was Film Noir, with a few others very close.

[blindcommissioner]

Alistair S, on 27 March 2011 - 09:37 PM, said:

Yes, some very good lyrics this month! My personal winner was Film Noir, with a few others very close.

some great lyrics. i found it difficult to score. if i did it again i'd probably get different scores!!! but i did try my best!! my favourites were bluebird and afraid to open my eyes.

andy

[Midway]

blindcommissioner, on 27 March 2011 - 04:48 PM, said:

Alistair S, on 27 March 2011 - 09:37 PM, said:

Yes, some very good lyrics this month! My personal winner was Film Noir, with a few others very close.

some great lyrics. i found it difficult to score. if i did it again i'd probably get different scores!!! but i did try my best!! my favourites were bluebird and afraid to open my eyes.

andy

I'll say, Andy. I had finishing in order: It Doesn't Touch Me, Film Noir, then all these ties - Afraid To Open My Eyes, Love Don't Work That Way, The River, Just a Dream, and Sunday Night Song Affair. Good batch, definitely.

Maybe Neal and his better half had an out of town gig these weekend or something.

[Midway]

Shall we all just claim authorship before the scores are released and start the mutual admiration society meeting early?

[kimberlyinnc]

Personally, I think we should wait, because then it will just add additional posts, one for congrats then another for admiration

Neal...where you at??


Kim

ps..impatient little musers, aren't we?

[Neal K]

Sorry for the delay folks. The results are on my office computer, which I forgot to bring home for the weekend. I'll have the results up Monday morning.

Neal

[Neal K]

Once again, I apologize for the delay in getting the results out. Here they are:


1st Place - 123 Points
The River, by Jonie

2nd Place - 119 Points
It Doesn't Touch Me, Starsinmyeyes

3rd Place - 117 Points
I Remember Music, Scubed

Congratulations to the winners and everyone who entered. It was a good turnout this month. Here are the overall scores:

The River, Jonie
7 7 6 8 8 9 5 9 7 6 7 6 8 8 7 8 7 123
It Doesn't touch me, Stars in My Eyes
9 7 7 6 6 8 5 7 7 6 8 7 9 8 7 5 7 119
I Remember Music, Scubed
6 7 6 7 8 6 5 8 7 7 7 6 7 7 10 5 8 117
Film Noir, Fabkebab
8 6 5 6 8 6 4 5 7 7 7 8 8 9 8 6 8 116
Bluebird, Midway
6 7 8 6 9 9 5 6 8 6 7 6 5 6 7 7 7 115
L'affaire à un café de Paris, Neuron
6 6 7 5 7 8 4 5 8 7 7 7 8 8 7 6 9 115
Don't tell me things will be OK, Alistair
6 6 5 6 10 5 5 9 7 9 6 8 6 6 5 6 6 111
Love Don't Work That Way, Zeek
7 6 7 5 6 6 5 7 7 8 8 5 6 6 9 5 7 110
Just a Dream, Gordon
7 7 6 5 6 6 4 6 7 5 8 6 8 5 7 6 9 108
Sunday Night Song Affair, RKG
7 8 7 6 6 6 6 5 8 7 6 6 6 5 6 5 7 107
Reckless, klo
5 5 5 7 6 5 5 6 8 8 6 7 6 7 7 6 6 105
Afraid to Open My Eyes, Andy LeF
7 6 8 5 6 4 5 5 6 5 8 4 8 5 8 6 7 103
Tonight I'm Gonna Feel Bad, Feegis
6 5 4 5 8 4 5 8 7 7 7 5 8 5 7 6 6 103
Love has Room Enough, Graybeard
5 6 6 6 6 5 4 5 8 3 7 5 5 5 7 6 6 95
Branded by your eyes, Mike5877
5 5 5 5 5 5 5 5 8 5 7 5 5 6 6 5 7 94
I See Now, Kimberlyinnc
5 5 6 5 6 6 4 6 7 5 7 4 5 5 6 5 6 93
The Moon, Zeligovitch
5 5 6 5 6 6 4 5 6 6 7 3 8 4 7 5 5 93
Who Is Free, BlindCommisioner
5 6 6 5 6 5 4 5 7 4 6 3 6 4 7 5 5 89

[Zeligovitch]

Congratulations to the deserving winners, even if my favourite was Alistair’s lyrics.
So, I’m 17th. I’m doing worse and worse every time in these contests . I should retire and above all contemplate what my English teacher said at school : «learn another language, please!»

[kimberlyinnc]

Congrats to Jonie
Stars and Scubed!!!

Some mighty fine lyrics.

I had Tied for first
The River and Don't tell me things will be OK
2nd was Tonight I'm gonna feel bad...

A lot of ties this month, because I didn't want to mark others so darn low to bring up the others, and with so many of them...lots of lyrics this time..
and I had a difficult time scoring, because it could go either way with several of them...

Kimberly

This post has been edited by kimberlyinnc: 28 March 2011 - 06:00 PM

[Alistair S]

Well done Jonie, Stars and Scubed!

Three excellent lady lyricists! The cream always rises to the top!

[Zeek]

Quote

The cream always rises to the top!

I think my milk is sour.

Zeek

[Gordon]

Yes, congratulations!

I had The River at the top, Bluebird next, then a bazillion-way tie for third... i'll be curious to check my "rankings" to see if the scores sifted out similar at all to how i slotted everything! though off the top of my head, i recollect that I had Alistair's "Don't Tell Me..." and Feegis' "Tonight, I'm Gonna..." and Graybeard's "Love Has Room..." up in my upper echelon...

[AndyLeF]

Zeek, on 28 March 2011 - 10:57 PM, said:

Quote

The cream always rises to the top!

I think my milk is sour.

Zeek

Seems my effort was past it's sell by date as well!

Difficult to score this month, every lyric had something going for it

My favorite was "Sunday Night Song Affair" - some great ideas there.
Tied 2nd for me were "Bluebird", "The River", "I Remember Music", "It Doesn't Touch Me" and "Just a Dream".

Andy

[Midway]

Congratulations to this months creme de la creme.

Jonie, really achingly good piece. Stars, I had you pegged on the top this month, so I wasn't far off in the end. Scooby-D, I had you neck and neck with a whole bunch of others, all near the top group. This was probably the hardest month to winnow out the top songs since I started doing these contests. The depth of field really makes you take the extra time to weigh one against another. And that's a good thing, as Martha Stewart would say.

Thanks to Neal for herding this month. And thanks to everyone who voted my piece high enough to keep it in the running.

[Gordon]

I agree, AndyLeF... when i submitted my scores to Neal, i commented that i thought so many of these had SOMETHING i really liked about it, and then maybe a couple few things that maybe could use a little punching or touching up or something... it was very hard to discern and i kept shuffling my rankings considerably...

(and thanks for the nod... i always appreciate hearing that somebody likes something i write... i get a lot of mixed reactions, but that's okay, i'm still new and this was my first sub-200 word effort, I think... actually, who am i kidding, i think this may have been my first sub-300 word effort! )

[scubed]

Congratulations, Jonie and Stars! Two terrific lyrics!

In fact, there were so many creative and interesting lyrics this month I had a really hard time with scoring. I found something to like in all of the lyrics and a great deal to like in many of them. I had "It Doesn't Touch Me" at the top and "The River" and a number of other lyrics more or less tied for second. (Zeligovitch, you were in my "tied for second" group - I think "The Moon" would work as an art song.)

Thanks so much to those of you who liked "I Remember Music"!

[fabkebab]

Well done Jonie - I picked yours as my winner. I also liked Bluebird

Who was voter number 7? They were a bit sour, apparently offering 4 and 5s to everyone!

[starsinmyeyes]

Congratulations jonie! As I've said elsewhere, this song flowed so well, I should have known it was yours! And to scubed - You were my top pick this month, that was a wonderful lyric also.

I also loved Film Noir, Love Don't Work That Way, Afraid To Open My Eyes and Tonight I'm Gonna Feel Bad. I enjoyed all the entries - it's fantastic that so many people are submitting lyrics !

[blindcommissioner]

congrats to the winner.

as i've said previously my top 2 were bluebird and afraid to open my eyes.

this will help keep my feet on the ground!!! an honary mention in american songwriter last month - bottom of the class this month!!!

we'll have to see how my lyric is recieved as a song - i've got the backing track almost done!!

andy

[feegis]

Congratulations to the winners!! Excellent lyrics.

Quote

I don't think it's me either......

(well.....weren't you proven wrong? Nice lyric, Jonie.)

There is some great writing throughout the entries. Some of the most consistently solid writing I think I've seen in the contests. Every lyric had something positive.

I had Stars' "It Doesn't Touch Me" and Gordon's "Just A Dream" tied for the lead. I'm always impressed with the writing here, and I'm always flattered when I see someone thought positively of mine.

Best Regards,
Feegis

[kimberlyinnc]

This is something that came to me after a few reviews of my lyric on the lyrical comment board.

Would it be something that would be allowed on the upcoming lyrical contests, for a lyricist to add just one line before their lyric as to the genre they hear the song in, or an artist they hear the style in? I think it would help a great deal when scoring a lyric. Though I suppose if it were allowed and I was the only one that did it, it would not work out too good, but if the lyricist were reminded to do it, if that were decided, then it would not make one of us stand out as much...remain unnamed

For instance in my lyric, I See Now
I would have put before it, in the style of Jason Mraz.

Is this something we could consider doing? Would other lyricists be interested in doing this? Is it something we could talk about?

Kimberly

[jonie]

Kim, my first thought, before I moved on to reading the actual lyric, would be "who is Jason Mraz?" I could go with maybe including a genre (as in, country, rock, jazz, folk, etc) with the observation that people can often guess a genre anyway by looking at the structure and rhythm of the lyric. The other objection I might have is to say that I don't always know what genre my lyric would fit best into. I'd probably find myself labeling everything Americana or Judy Collinsish.

But I'm a good sport and will go with the general consensus. It's not a big deal.

By the way, I think this month's Lyric Contest is a travesty of the highest order. How on earth did I win? Granted, my lyric has some potential but, put up against the likes of Fab's Film Noir, Alistair's Driftwood, Ron's L'affair...klo's Reckless, Tracy's It Doesn't Touch Me - I just don't see how such a thing can happen.

Congrats Tracy and scubed. A female tour de force.

Thank you to all who liked The River well enough to put it on top.

[Zeek]

As a songwriter first I see/judge a lyric as something I can form a melody to, has cadence, rhythm, and of course, substance--telling a story. A few lyrics were more free form or poetic-heavy and that's ok, but it's just not what I'm used to. It's a mixed bag and that's the point of it I guess. My highest votes went to the ones I thought could be songs.

I think a lyric should not be labeled as "in the style of", etc. I think that if it's strong enough it will stand on its own and cross barriers if need be. I rarely enter lyric contests here but it is fun for sure and it gives me a chance to see this side of the site more. What I absolutely love about the lyric contest is it anonymity. It's almost impossible to do that in the song contest but here it's the real gem behind the scenes, the 12th man as it were. I could probably guess 1 or 2 authors and you guys maybe more as you see this side more often than me, but not knowing who did what is a breath of fresh air for me.

Zeek

[Midway]

blindcommissioner, on 29 March 2011 - 08:15 AM, said:

congrats to the winner.

as i've said previously my top 2 were bluebird and afraid to open my eyes.

this will help keep my feet on the ground!!! an honary mention in american songwriter last month - bottom of the class this month!!!

we'll have to see how my lyric is recieved as a song - i've got the backing track almost done!!

andy

Hey Andy, kind of tangential to what you posted here: Which entry of yours made honorary mention in Am. Songwriter last month? I subscribe because I've entered a couple of their contests and have that issue laying around here somewhere. Also, what is your overall impression of the "winners" they tend to choose?

[neuroron]

Zeek, on 29 March 2011 - 07:32 PM, said:

As a songwriter first I see/judge a lyric as something I can form a melody to, has cadence, rhythm, and of course, substance--telling a story. A few lyrics were more free form or poetic-heavy and that's ok, but it's just not what I'm used to. It's a mixed bag and that's the point of it I guess. My highest votes went to the ones I thought could be songs.

I think a lyric should not be labeled as "in the style of", etc. I think that if it's strong enough it will stand on its own and cross barriers if need be. I rarely enter lyric contests here but it is fun for sure and it gives me a chance to see this side of the site more. What I absolutely love about the lyric contest is it anonymity. It's almost impossible to do that in the song contest but here it's the real gem behind the scenes, the 12th man as it were. I could probably guess 1 or 2 authors and you guys maybe more as you see this side more often than me, but not knowing who did what is a breath of fresh air for me.

Zeek

I agree in large part with Zeek. But I have decided that I have no idea how to quantitatively rate an isolated lyric. My top tier included "Don't say that I'm okay," "film noir," "The River" and "Bluebird" but everything was pretty packed in together and the lowest score I gave was a 5 or 6. Also, as I implied above, don't get either too upset or a too swelled head from my scoring, because as I'm learning it probably isn't worth anything. Two of the lyrics in the contest that I didn't have on the top of my list as I recall, Zeligovitch and Kim's, when I put in time and worked with them after they were posted on the Forum, I really got to like them quite a bit. Specifically, Kim's when I came at it with a reference of Jason Mraz, changed my viewpoint. When you're evaluating a large group of these lyrics, it's difficult to put extensive time working with a lyric to know what's really there. I can tell you right away if lyric has something that engages me enough to want to set it to music, but I can't tell you right away whether something that seems like it's not that good may actually be pretty decent.

I know that when I try to set a lyric in music, ordinarily I prefer not to have any idea what the lyricist had in mind, I would rather engage all possibilities - however my limitations, shouldn't impact the score in the contest. Just like I try not to let my own prejudices about certain kinds of music influence my score. So I think that giving the genre or some kind of orienting remark would be just fine.

Finally, and I know this is easier said than done, but we should probably not take the scores we get too seriously. For me, who has only entered his second lyric contest, I consider this a prompt to write something and I have a kind of morbid curiosity what kind of scores I get. I guess though, as much as I hate to admit it, I'm probably pretty competitive -- at least that's what my wife says, and after all these years I do have enough sense not to contradict her -- and so I can't completely blunt an emotional response to winning or losing. I also use a psychological defense that I don't pretend to be a "real" lyricist, I'm just a tourist here -- Ron

[Alistair S]

I agree, too.

In fact, the lyric contest is a world all of its own. There are good lyrics that would never "make it" in the contest because of the absence of the music. The contest definitely (to my mind) suits some types of lyrics over others and we choose accordingly.

Indeed, in the past, I have entered (and won with) lyrics that I never intend(ed) to develop into a song - they were just exercises designed for the medium of the competition.

We all have our psychological defences, too!

Here's one - when we look through the entries, we see some lyrics we like, and a lot that we don't rate highly. Which lyrics fall into which category will vary according to taste. But, guess what? The people who wrote the lyrics you didn't rate are the judges of the contest!

As it turns out, I do think the better lyrics are generally scored at, or near, the top. However, there are often lyrics that I rated but which don't score well, and I am frequently surprised.

I think the best way to look at it is as a bit of fun and maybe a bit of a showcase - but not to take it too seriously. The eventual songs are what matter, after all.

I also think it is worth selecting lyrics that are "contest friendly" to enter - and those may not always be the lyrics you most love to sing!

I see no real harm in letting people have a very short intro to a lyric.. maybe 20 words or so, if they choose. If nothing else, it may make the "guess the writer" game so many of us play that much easier!!

[Neal K]

I'm not convinced that labelling an entry with a genre or saying “this is in the style of” is a good idea. It would be an unnecessary complication that could lead to requests for other qualifiers to be added to the entries. Where would it end? This is a lyric contest, not a genre contest. Let the words on the page stand (or fall) on their own merit. And remember: it's just for fun.

I remember an episode on Bewitched, where Aunt Clara accidentally brought Shakespeare into the present and she couldn’t figure out how to get him back. To keep him occupied while they sorted out the mess, Samantha enrolled him in a Shakespeare course in a local school. He failed. There’s a point somewhere in this story that relates to these lyric contests.

Neal

[kimberlyinnc]

Ok Neal, I was just asking... .as a couple of people said to me, if they had known the genre I had in mind /or the singer style, they would have scored my lyric differently...so I thought perhaps it would benefit lyricists to have that opportunity.

On the lyrical forum, we are encouraged to note genre or the style.. so I thought, why not for the contest too...I know on the lyrical board when I critique, knowing that little bit of info helps me to understand the thought behind it and what they intend it to be.

It would not make it a genre contest.

Maybe just make us a more informed scorer. Just my opinion..not only mine, but anyways..

Ok..no need to defend this anymore.

It's no biggie and Neal, I don't have to be reminded it's just for fun. I am not having a mad fit here, I am just asking a question and offering a suggestion.

It won't affect my life either way. Just thought, since it was mentioned to me, I would bring it up.

Have a good day, and thanks for all you do for the contests.



Kim--done with adding my 2 cents worth